And I live with the notion
That I don't need anyone but me.

Here's the part where I tell you, in the endless space of the Internet, that I lost my job at Blake's. This is the bad occurrence to level out the wonderful obtainment of my DMB tickets.
I knew it was coming, I'm not naive to the fact that it was inevitable. Yet it wasn't for the reasons that I figured it would be, but still, I don't have a job... what does it matter the reason?

I'm blindly optimistic as of now. There seem to be plenty of possibilities in the job market despite my ability to figure out what I actually need to keep me settled for more than a month or two.

I feel that I can't have a job where my personality towards coworkers is what my position relies on (oh gosh). I can't bite my tongue and I can't pretend to be happy. I'm not incredibly outgoing. I can pretend to be for a little while, but after some time I become closer to what I am. In a work atmosphere, I tend to attain the quiet wallflower personality. This doesn't go over well in most places.

Also, if I'm not thrilled I have a tendency to break the rules.

I'm not sure what that leaves me with. Perhaps an overnight position where I can complete my duties without a boss breathing over my shoulder pushing me.



Stones taught me to fly & love taught me to lie.

My mother bought us Dave Matthews Tickets..!

It's for a show on July 9th and I can't wait! From what it seems, we got decent seats. Now all I can pray for is a cement-solid ride & that he plays the songs that I've been dying to hear.

I've been thinking about THE LOSER alot lately. Of course, I realize how low I'm sinking by wanting to be with him. It's not my mind but my heart that fights for THE LOSER.

Brandon was the reason that I wanted him to be back in my life in the first place.

It's really sad when THE LOSER is a dream lover in comparison to the 4 months after-the-fact rebound guy. I mean, I should worship the statue that is THE LOSER after the horrid sex that I've had with the 2 other dudes that have been in my bed. Not reaching climax is one thing, but feeling total disgust is a totally different story.

Brandon will forever be in the reference books for the definition of a big clingy vaginal whiner.

I'm wired because of 4 + hours of ticket searching.
The only problem is that when something great happens, something equally terrible usually afflicts me in some sort of weird karmic bitch-slap.

For example: as I received my long lost wallet and immediately I found out that my paycheck was very small. It's a theme for me.