I'm not entirely sure what happened with BAD IDEA the other night, and if anything happened at all. I feel a sort of disconnection from the situation.
To summarize, it was very physical. I'm in fear that he's lonely, and that's all this is. That it's all this ever will be.
Since the time I spent with BAD IDEA, it's all I can think about.
I fear that if I talk about him to my poor friend that some sort of episode will occur similar to the movie DEATH BECOMES HER when Goldie Hawn was in the mental institution.
In the scene, Goldie's character was obsessed with this person, during group therapy the psychiatrist asked what was on her mind and when she began to repeat what she had always said, the group broke out in screams of horror.
I feel like if I say BAD IDEA one more time to Jen, she might fall to the ground and pull her hair out howling or something. I talk about him way too much. I even get a little paranoid that I’m blogging too much about him, too.
My Christmas sucked but my Christmas Eve rocked-- I spent it with my mother. She played her guitar and sang, something that she's shy about doing for people.
We solidified plans to take a trip to Boston at some point. She'll show me her view of the city *SHOPPING AND DRINKING* and I'll show her mine *THE MUSEUM OF FINE ARTS & THE ROCKIN' T SYSTEM MANCH SHOULD TAKE POINTERS FROM*.
I was able to buy a Dave Matthews 'Live at Lutherin College" double CD and the third season of "Aqua Teen Huger Force" on DVD.
If my computer can be fixed within the century, I will be able to delete alot of my episodes to free up some space.
I have realized today that I am not going to make rent, so I am going to go down to the welfare office and try to get emergency housing assistance. I am terrified.
This experience will hopefully push me to get a new job that will guarentee full-time hours and at least 10 dollars an hour pay. It's the only way I will survive through this.
To summarize, it was very physical. I'm in fear that he's lonely, and that's all this is. That it's all this ever will be.
Since the time I spent with BAD IDEA, it's all I can think about.
I fear that if I talk about him to my poor friend that some sort of episode will occur similar to the movie DEATH BECOMES HER when Goldie Hawn was in the mental institution.
In the scene, Goldie's character was obsessed with this person, during group therapy the psychiatrist asked what was on her mind and when she began to repeat what she had always said, the group broke out in screams of horror.
I feel like if I say BAD IDEA one more time to Jen, she might fall to the ground and pull her hair out howling or something. I talk about him way too much. I even get a little paranoid that I’m blogging too much about him, too.
My Christmas sucked but my Christmas Eve rocked-- I spent it with my mother. She played her guitar and sang, something that she's shy about doing for people.
We solidified plans to take a trip to Boston at some point. She'll show me her view of the city *SHOPPING AND DRINKING* and I'll show her mine *THE MUSEUM OF FINE ARTS & THE ROCKIN' T SYSTEM MANCH SHOULD TAKE POINTERS FROM*.
I was able to buy a Dave Matthews 'Live at Lutherin College" double CD and the third season of "Aqua Teen Huger Force" on DVD.
If my computer can be fixed within the century, I will be able to delete alot of my episodes to free up some space.
I have realized today that I am not going to make rent, so I am going to go down to the welfare office and try to get emergency housing assistance. I am terrified.
This experience will hopefully push me to get a new job that will guarentee full-time hours and at least 10 dollars an hour pay. It's the only way I will survive through this.
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