Everything, everything will be just fine.
I’ve been feeling very much like a bug in a world of feet – this wonderful place is simply full of spiked heels that would like nothing more than to smush the hell out of me.
In the life and times of Katherine M. Katsikas, good news is almost always immediately followed by bad news.
Shall we begin at the beginning? Drum roll, please?
For the past three or so weeks, money and good will have been falling into my lap. Every time I went to Wednesday Night at Amoskaeg, I was yelling BINGO for a generous payday. My winnings in scratch tickets reached within the 90$ range.
A couple cavities made themselves known and as if magically, I was presented with a gift to the Dentist for not only a cleaning, but for the whole SHABANG. With serious issues with my wisdom teeth and little holes every which way, this could set my family back thousands of dollars.
PLEASE PASS GO, PLEASE COLLECT 200 DOLLARS.
Gladly, kind sir! I think I’ll save up my colorful dollars for Boardwalk & Park Place. I’ve got the funny feeling I’ll land on it soon enough.
Just when I seemed to be having a streak of good luck and the general feeling of fear had subsided, I got that all too familiar bitch-slap back to reality.
COMMUNITY CHEST.
This'll be great! I'm positive I'll win the Beauty Contest!
GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS.
Oh. No. Just when I thought I might win this game.
So, you want the bad news, do ya? Remember that Temp thing I've been stuck in for the past year? Well, they let me go of my current job in the same way that Enrollment let me go.
The agency loves to say "your assignment is ending", which is the equivalent of telling a child that a man "retired" when what they were really saying was that he died. It's a simpler way of doing the You're Fired thing.
It's an event that is without all of the red tape and explanations, just a simple phone call or email and that pesky fucker is out of their hair forever.
Big companies just love temps because of this exact reason.
If someone doesn't fit in the puzzle just right, they can simply
end the assignment and that is that.
Bravo, Katie, you screwed up again? You ready for round 3? How about Customer Service, or do you think you've finally reached K.O.?
....and suddenly I feel like Milton.... they're telling me to be patient and wait for the cake, but I pass it and pass it and finally there isn't any left for me.... my stapler has constantly turned up missing... they've moved my desk about six times a week, soon I'll be killing rodents in the basement.... that whiny jerk in the cubicle beside me has been asking me to turn off my radio but screw him, why should I bend over backward for a man that's depression has been driven by his own complacency ?.... the audience laughs at me when I vehemently say that I'm going to burn down the damn building... but soon they're going to see.... soon they're gonna see......
2 comments:
I'm sorry that this happened to you. It does suck to be at the short end of the stick. Umn, regarding the underwear explanation....I'll tell you tomorrow, can't go to my blog from here or everyone will know I gotz one. Remember that old saying that God doesn't close a door without opening a window? Well, there are at least four times more windows than doors. I'm trying to cheer you up here, throw me a bone. Stop looking at me like I'm some sort of pseudofreak of some sort...
Well, thank you, Psuedofreak. I have been trying to think up a superhero name for my friend Shawn here, but in the meantime I have discovered yours. From here on, you shall be reborn "PSUEDOFREAK". Chew on that, it tastes good.
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