I am an employee of Public Service of New Hampshire, or so says the company's official 3-headed Cerberus, Elaine Dame. I should be feeling a heavy lift come off of my chest, yet it is quite the opposite situation. After 8 months of struggle to get in the door, the feeling is that I'm looking forward to quite a bit more struggle.My rationalization is this: 16$ an hour is crazy money in the Queen City... PSNH will want it's bang for the buck. I've been a temp in several companies like this one, and it seems to me that they enjoy the Type A personality, while I rest very comfortably in the latter.
Can I be what they need? Am I going to fit in? Can I walk the scary thin line that is Uber Professionalism? I certainly haven't cut it at any of my former jobs, and even if I had stayed at Southern NH Services for a lifetime, it just isn't on the same planet as PSNH.
I can't judge my growth based on this small time job, for there are people who've worked here who spent years in prison for assault with a deadly weapon... the smelliest, angriest little Oompa in the Universe... and women who can't get in other jobs for various reasons...
In reality, this vocation is like "The Goonies" of the work force, a smorgasbord of mostly okay folks who've been sub-par in their previous positions. I am a "Goonie" in this sense, truly, and I think it's what scares me the most. I fit in at SNHS because I've been sub-par, and when I convinced PSNH otherwise, it was mostly BS.
The real question is, how long can I keep up the lie? Can Katie become the lie, and maybe be the kind of professional I wish I could be?
Can I be what they need? Am I going to fit in? Can I walk the scary thin line that is Uber Professionalism? I certainly haven't cut it at any of my former jobs, and even if I had stayed at Southern NH Services for a lifetime, it just isn't on the same planet as PSNH.
I can't judge my growth based on this small time job, for there are people who've worked here who spent years in prison for assault with a deadly weapon... the smelliest, angriest little Oompa in the Universe... and women who can't get in other jobs for various reasons...
In reality, this vocation is like "The Goonies" of the work force, a smorgasbord of mostly okay folks who've been sub-par in their previous positions. I am a "Goonie" in this sense, truly, and I think it's what scares me the most. I fit in at SNHS because I've been sub-par, and when I convinced PSNH otherwise, it was mostly BS.
The real question is, how long can I keep up the lie? Can Katie become the lie, and maybe be the kind of professional I wish I could be?
I'm definitely going to give it a go. Wish me luck.
This is Katie, conquering the T-Rex of all jobs. 
2 comments:
Don't become that! Do what I do. Get multiple personalities. Be one Katie while at work and as soon as 5pm hits, change into your true self. It's the best thing you can do to keep your saneness.
You know, I actually have that for my phone disposition, which is my "Super Katie" personality. I guess maybe I should take on "Professional Katie" for the office.
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